jeffioo (jeffioo) wrote in gayrelationship,

Relatiship Ending.

 I have been with my boyfriend(ex for now) for 5 years.  We have been through alot.  We started a life together.  Financial investments, family, friends, and the whole domestic thing.  

<lj-cut text="Back story"> 

Again, after 5 years we have alot together.   

Let's start with me.  I am 26 years old and this is my second long term relationship.  My first was 4 years.  Anyway, I loved our life together.   I think our problems started when we started having 3-ways.  This led to BOTH of us being less than faithful.   I more than him.   I met someone about a year ago but was never serious about it although he found emails that  said otherwise.   I assured him that he was want I wanted for life.  We invested over $20,000 in a awesome backyard and pool.   Saying that, this is all under my name and credit.  He really doesnt have any.   Anyway, I also have a slight drinking problem and do stupid things when I drink.   I don't get physical but I can say really mean things.   It's really a binge drinking problem.   I am willing to work on it but all this stress is causing me to go down hill faster and faster.   I'm not looking for sympathy by any means.  Just thought I should be honest.

About him:  He is 41 years old.  Yes, considerably older but I never had a problem with that until recently.  He has always kept up with me and we partied alot together.    I was never one for the 3ways but he got me into it.   He has a heart of gold and has done so much for me.  He cooked cleaned and worked his ass off.  He is a cop so he used to work alot of details to add to our money.   We both did pretty good.   More recently, he met these two older guys.  One is like 65 and one is 60.  They have been together for 30+ years.   He really started comparing our relationship to theirs and all of our friends to them.   I distanced myself from that scene cause it wasnt for me.   Not just because of the age difference but because I enjoyed my friends closer in age.   

Now the delima:   About 5 months ago I met this boy who I absolutely went banannas over.  He was so cute, sexy, and fun.   I did fool around with him.   On the other hand, he fooled around with him when I was asleep in the same room.   That hurt me, even though I did the same thing.    We got passed it and I introduced this new boy to a friend and they started dating.   Well, this new boy didnt have a place to stay so my boyfriend agreed to let him stay with us.  That was a big mistake.   I started spending all my time with him and my boyfriend spent his time with the older dudes.   Eventually, my boyfriend told me that he had to leave or we were done.   So, I sent him away to another state.  My stipulation was that we needed to spend less time with the older dudes who put their two cents in our relationship more than they should have.   Oh, btw not that this is that important but they are millionares who like hanging with younger guys.   And my bf was very matierialistic so I guess they feed off each other.   Anyway, I moved to a friends house for some space.   My bf asked me to come back but I was just jaded I guess.   Well, the new boy that I sent away wanted to come back and I didnt see things working so I brought him back to live with me at the friends house.   When my bf found out he freaked, which he had the right to.   

So, now he is moving out to the older dudes house on the 1st of feb.   And the new boy is staying at my mothers house.   The new boy doesnt have anything.   He doesnt have a car.  I got him a job.   My dad takes him to and from work.   He's got criminal problems.  Dealing with DUI's.  warrants ect.   Plus, he has gotten physical and put his hands on me, popped my tires stranding me...ect.   Yet, he's too cute and acts like he truly loves me.  Gives me affection and all which I havent gotten really in the past year from the ex.   I know its not the best situation.    Now, on the other hand, my currenty bf (ex for now) is leaving me with all the finances.  Since they were in my name he can do that.  He says I can have everything but I cant afford it.   I have begged him to stay and he made a bunch of stipulations.  He says I cant talk to my old friends.  I cant go out.  I cant do hardly anything.   I finally said no, I wont live like that.   Is that being too harsh.   He told me he's not in love with me and that he feels sorry for me and only loves me like a father.   

Should I just let him go?
Should I try to make things work with this new boy?
Am I just filling an emotional void to put up with the new boys antics?
What do you guys think?

I know... what a cluster fuck right?  lol


Thanks in advance for any advice

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